The Fruits of Lovelessness
There are no winners in divorce. Marriage breakdown is always a painful business, often after a long process of eroded trust and the distance created by infidelity. What once seemed bright is now dark: love has gone. The Old Testament law given through Moses recognised that there may come a point where a married couple were unwilling or unable to restore the relationship, and that divorce was the only way ahead (Deuteronomy 24:1).
However, that law was embellished by religious leaders - giving a husband the opportunity to divorce his wife for trivial reasons, as the Pharisees identified (Matthew 19:3-9). The certificate of divorce seemed to be a licence for the husband to relieve himself of any responsibility towards his wife. Of course, adultery is the serious marriage-breaker and in that case if the couple cannot forgive and rebuild trust, then divorce provides a way out of unbearable pain.
But, Jesus said, the consequence of a 'divorce of convenience’ will ripple on into another marriage. The 'one flesh' principle (Genesis 2:24; Mark 10:4-12) remains in God's eyes and is embedded into our consciences. Therefore Jesus said that remarriage becomes an adulterous offence against the first marriage. Jesus was also using this practical example to demonstrate the lasting nature of love in His kingdom, which is also the model for human relationships (Ephesians 5:25-27).
In God's kingdom, love is the essence of relationship. It is about giving and reconciling in order to build relationships which express the mutual love of the Father with the Son and the Spirit. Love does not expose others to harm or put them in danger of offending God. It is not so much a feeling, as a covenant commitment to seek the best for the other (1 Corinthians 13:4-7) and to work through the difficulties to secure what is best. The tragic pain of dysfunctional human relationships can lead us to accept less than the best; that is why we need the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit (2 Corinthians 13:14) to help us to attain God’s best in a sin-riddled world.